Judgment Day

We have talked about change before, but it's really a topic that deserves some true exploration and one I can see musing about often (fair warning!). You see, change is something that intrinsically feels like it has to happen around us in order for our true selves to flourish. Even when we believe we are changing ourselves, we often change our habits (eating less) or engage in new ones (exercise more) in order to drive results. We change the action, and often times, the physical result does look different. But how does it make us feel? We can change the way we look and how we present ourselves to the world, but who are we on the day when that some one or some circumstance does not honor the change? Who are we when we look and feel our best, but we do not get the response we were hoping for? What do we do when we prepare for a big moment, only to fall short in other people's eyes? If the answer is not a whole hearted affirmation for our choice, then we are stagnant in our journey. It does not matter if we move forward, sideways or backwards, as long as we are moving. This is the change from the inside- the one that happens in our own lens of the world, the acceptance of ourselves and the realization that what other people think of us, even to the smallest degree, will always put an obstacle in our path. Removing obstacles is much easier than mining through the friends we have, paring down our activities and limiting our interaction with emotionally draining people or experiences. While all of these things can and will provide temporary relief to engage ourselves more fully in ourselves, they are just illusions of the change we need to fulfill within our true hearts. When the changes we make to the outside world affect how the outside world views us, it can influence how we feel about our own journey. But revolutionary metamorphasis occurs when we put on our blinders to the people around us- because we cannot and will never be able to control their reactions to us. We could always try and liken ourselves in each moment to tailor to the person or experience with which we are dealing (and how often we do!) but the truth is that this behavior is exhausting work and takes up too much of our energy! It also masks our true nature in a very skilled social dance that we have been practicing our whole lives. We often cage our identity in a very neat package and show that side to the world very strategically, but we all have our dark side of the moon. It is in bringing out that side to ourselves, for ourselves, and embrace the light and the dark of ourselves, that we no longer spend all the energy to hide our secret shame and guilt, or simply our uniqueness, our gifts, for fear of the judgment that tags along for the ride. The harshest judgment comes from that which we label upon ourselves, and that fear translates effortlessly into our existence, starkly mirroring back to us all that we fear in ourselves. Let your journey take you to those places that you have kept hidden and allow the full reveal, as you may find that this release is enough to be the change in yourself that has been deflected in the struggle to change others perceptions of you. Notice that which you judge in others, and see how harshly you are really judging yourself. No change is greater or more fulfilling than the one in which you remove the fear and judgment of ourselves from the equation. If you are full of acceptance, it will never matter if someone does not approve of your choices or tries to knock you off your path. When you realize that they too are on the journey of removing the lens of judgment from themselves, you will finally understand, to begin with, it was never about you at all.

Today I will consciously notice the lens of judgment I put on myself and others. What can you do today?